John's Second letter from the field

Hello family,
Disclaimer: If this doesn't flow or make sense I'm sorry. There was a lot of stuff that happened this week so I might get jumbled up and not remember if I'd said a certain thing or not. I'm sorry.

My first week has been good but different. This place is completely different from Utah. Oh before I get deep into my letter I have something to tell you all. Here it is. If any of you ever smoke I'm literally chop your head off. It's disgusting. All health reasons aside it just looks stupid, sucking on a piece of paper that's on fire with crap inside. It also stinks horribly. Almost everyone here smokes. I just want to punch them in the face and say stop it you're killing yourself. But besides it being gross in my short half week here in Susquehanna I've already seen multiple cases of how smoking destroys your life. The first was a lady that we were teaching's father, they didn't say it was from smoking but I'm sure it was because he smoked, or still smokes, I don't know he might still be alive he might not I suppose I'll find out later this week. But anyway, he smoked and he had a heart attack/stroke. He had both. He went to the hospital for a day or two and the doctors said they were pretty sure he wasn't going to make it. (Oh funny story but I'll tell it in a second). So he went to the hospital but he checked himself out because they're pretty sure he's going to die soon and it's only a matter of time so he checked himself out so he could die at home. (His home is the one that I wrote about last time that was filthy. Honestly I'd rather die in a hospital than that house, but that hospital reminds me of a morgue so I don't know. I don't plan on being a patient there.) So now the moment you've all been waiting for. The funny story. Dun dun dun dun, with a fanfareish tone, (you get my drift) So we went to the hospital to visit Fred (that's the guys name who had the heart attoke (heart attack and stroke mixed together) and we couldn't find him so finally once a nurse lady showed up at the desk we asked her where Fred Stark was and she replied "He's gone" awkward pause then she realized what she'd said and said "oh not gone gone, he checked himself out." You'd think a person who works in a hospital would realize that saying that is kinda stupid and would lose that phrase from her vocabulary. I thought it was pretty funny. (Oh remind me when I get home from my mission to tell you the story about Chris Knapp. It's kinda long I might try telling it at the end if I have time but it's a dozy.) But back to my smoking ruins lives. The other story's. We went to a less active lady's house last night and her husband was missing an eye and had some crazy tumor on his neck that the doctors are going to do a biopsy on either today or sometime this week, I can't remember. The last example is we went to a couples house and they both smoke and their house smells disgusting and they both can hardly breathe because they smoke so much. The morals of these stories are if I come back and anyone I know smokes I'm going to chop their heads off. Just don't do it it's disgusting and kills you. So now to how my first week was.

This whole week was new. I didn't really know anyone so i had to ask my companion constantly "Do we know them? or Who is that? or What's their story?" Everyone here pretty much knows everyone. It's one of those towns where lots of people are related and know everyone else's business. As I've heard two people here say. "People here know your business before you do." So we know a lot of people and it's kinda hard trying to get to know everyone and all their stories. But I think I'm getting it. Luckily Sunday helped a lot. I got to know a lot of the members. My first Sunday was a dozy. It was pretty much pouring rain all day until like 2-3. (When the party started thankfully) The Elder who I replaced is going home and he'd been here for about 7 1/2 months so he knew pretty much everyone and everyone loved him. His name is Elder Ulrich. I think they said they live in North Ogden but I don't remember. Anyway after the baptism (I'll get to that later, it requires more than just a sentence) they were having a going away party type thing and we had to set up for that and there were a lot of people there. I got to meet lots of nonmembers and just people in the community. There was a lot of food and stuff like that and it was a good thing because I was starving by the time it started. We had to set up a whole bunch of tables and chairs in the rain and we also had to get them there. Lets just say at the end of the day my suit pants were pretty muddy, as were my shoes but they are a lot easier to clean.
Church was good too. I met a lot of people and I think I know most of their names, there aren't a ton to remember. We have church in a old baptist or Methodist or some other church meeting house. That church doesn't meet in it anymore but the church is leasing it so we use it. There are enough people here to have a legit meeting house so we have that tiny thing. The ward members are all really nice and apparently we get fed pretty good in the half a week I've been here we've been fed by people twice and we have like 3 or 4 this week so far. My branch president is really nice. His name is President Hansen. He isn't in our branch boundaries but they called him anyway. The term for him is an implant. He just serves in our branch even though he doesn't live in the boundaries. With that song you heard you could send that to me anyway so i could use it if the need arises. Sorry my pictures didnt' work the computer was being stupid so I'll just send the card when it gets close to full. Jordan have fun a BYU. Don't be nervous. It's not bad. It's super fun, at least BYU-I was. You have a roommate that you're already good friends with so even if all your other roommates are poo heads you can hang out with Kyle and not have to deal with them too much. It's not like a mission where if you get a poopy companion you're stuck with them. (No I'm not complaining about my companion. He's great) Have fun back at school all of you. I wish I could learn things besides church things. I suppose that will make me even better in college when I get back. Speaking of college what did my final grades end up being?
I'm glad you could go to the cabin and do a bunch of stuff there. I'm excited to see the renovations. The weather here is nice. I'm not sure how hot it is but it's not disgusting.
Tasha- why would you be going to the football game? Is it because of Brandon? What did you say your reason that you're going back to school? I didn't really understand it.
So now I suppose I'll tell you about the baptism. It was awesome. I think Satan was trying really hard to keep Judy ( the lady that got baptized) from getting baptized. Last week she had 2 aunts and one uncle die and then her father Fred (the hospital guy) had his heart attack/stroke. Then on the day of the baptism it was pouring rain and she got baptized in the river. Also on top of that she has 5 kids who are all under the age of 6 and are all little tornados. They never be quiet or stop running. She had to get them ready for church all by herself because her husband can't get Sundays off work, he's trying to or trying to get another job so he can to church and get baptized. So to top it all off the road down to the river was super wet and slippery and lots of people fell. I don't have much time so that's basically the jist of it. Well have fun without me for two years and I'll see you when I get back. Sorry I didn't have time to tell the Chris Knapp story. It's crazy.

Sincerely,
Elder Schouten